“Love is...”

Sunday, November 17, 2024

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

(1 Corinthians 13.4-7)

This passage is iconic. Perhaps its status reflects something of the shallow faith many profess, focusing on the warm and fuzzy parts of the Bible, but ignoring it when Jesus says things like “unless you repent, you will all likewise perish” (Lk 13.3). But in fact, God’s insistence on righteousness and purity grows out of love! When a person steals something, love for the victim means telling the thief to give it back. Beyond that, love for the thief means doing the same! Not only has he harmed his neighbor by his theft, but he has also harmed himself. What is best for him is to pay it back. It’s not that love is one aspect of God’s character, balanced out by such things as a sense of justice. Rather, “God is love” (1Jn 4.8). So, what else characterizes love?

Patient

Patience comes from the Latin verb patior, “I suffer.” This is why a doctor’s ailing customers are called patients, and also why Jesus’ experience of flogging, mocking, blasphemy, and crucifixion is sometimes called his passion, which comes from the same root. The people you love will do things to hurt you, and require you to do difficult things for them. Loving them means having a long temper, when this happens.

Kind

Instead of being kind, we’re often expected to be nice. Those are not the same thing! The latter is about being agreeable; but the former is about behaving properly toward others. Don’t just avoid hurting other people’s feelings—do what’s good for them!

Not Envious

Sometimes the people you love will be granted blessings you desire, but do not receive. It’s tempting to begrudge your loved ones their successes and blessings; but love means being happy for them, instead.

Not Boastful

The Greek word behind this, περπερεύομαι-perpereuomai, conveys a sense of constantly promoting oneself. The Christians at Corinth had a problem with this, and they were not alone! Love means counting “others more significant than yourselves” (Php 2.3).

Not Arrogant

While the ESV translation here is just fine, the old King James rendering better captured the image within the words: love “is not puffed up” (v4). The more inflated is your self-image, the less you walk in love.

Not Rude

We can recognize rudeness on sight, but may not be easily able to define it. Here, again, the KJV bails us out—love “Doth not behave itself unseemly” (v5), which is to say, in an improper or undignified fashion. Love is not out to overturn accepted norms for the thrill.

Not Self-seeking

Love seeks the good of others, even to its own hurt. The loving person does not ignore the needs of others, to advance himself!

Not Irritable

The Greek word behind this signifies being alway near a state of emotional disquiet. It comes from the word for “sharpen,” giving a vivid sense of the feeling involved. At the beginning of the list we saw that “Love is patient” (v4). Therefore it should not surprise us that it is not easily goaded into anger!

Not Resentful

This one has been inconsistently handled over the centuries, but the most literal and compelling translation (cf. ASV, CSB, NIV, NLT) holds that love “keeps no record of wrongs.” That’s the notion of resentment—hanging on to wrongs suffered, or nurturing grudges. In contrast, God tells us to forgive each other, as he has forgiven us (cf. Co 3.13)!

Rejoices with Truth, Not Evil

Most of the foregoing could have described one person’s loyalty or affection for another, even for an unrepentant sinner. Plenty of people have this sort of relationship, and call it love; but no matter how much affection you have for someone, you do not love that person, if you give your approval as they stray farther away from God. If your beloved’s goal were to steal and kill, love would mean hindering them from these goals, not rejoicing when they achieve them!

Bears All Things

This is not the usual, biblical sense of bearing a burden; it’s more like bearing up, in the face of adversity. The word behind it, στέγω-stegō, is associated with a roof—something that bears the elements and shelters what is beneath. This suggests bearing confidences.

Believes All Things

Is love is gullible? No, but it is willing to trust, and is not unreasonably suspicious.

Hopes All Things

It’s often tempting to give up hope—for our loved ones, and in them. Despair is not love.

Endures All Things

The list began with a lower form of patience—a slow temper—and it ends with a higher form of the same quality. This is not only tolerating troubles, but standing firm before them. Love means outlasting all challengers.

§

Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. …

So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

(1 Corinthians 13.8 & 13)

Jeremy Nettles

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